i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
