hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
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