I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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