Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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