Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
