no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
