batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
