Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
