You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
