found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
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