It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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