now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
