dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
Please, let me fuck your mom
She announced her abortion via fbk
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
