piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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