Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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