My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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