I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Is Oprah even human
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
