Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
