Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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