her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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