It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
