Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Randomize
