goodnight i made you a song goodbye
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
what day is it and did you see me today?
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Randomize
