Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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