Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Randomize
