i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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