Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
this just has baby written all over it
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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