I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Randomize
