Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
