i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
