That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
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