Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
