Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Randomize
