$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
