Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Be still, my beating vagina.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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