so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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