He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
