do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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