can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
