His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Randomize
