I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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