Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
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