I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
