i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Watching her eat just hurts me
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Randomize
