That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
