dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
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