He is like the real live version of the state fair..
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I can't put those talents on a resume
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
