Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
