Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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