You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
it glows. i had to have it.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Randomize
